Little moments of a big family

The lack of emotional security of our American young people is due, I believe, to their isolation from the larger family unit. No two people - no mere father and mother - as I have often said, are enough to provide emotional security for a child. He needs to feel himself one in a world of kinfolk, persons of variety in age and temperament, and yet allied to himself by an indissoluble bond which he cannot break if he could, for nature has welded him into it before he was born.
Pearl S. Buck

We were in San Diego recently in a little family-diner style restaurant, all 5 of us (at the time) lined up in little cushy seats in a row.  The three kids sat on one side, Cam in the middle and I sat on the end, full and pregnant, ready to bust with our 4th child.  A cool older dude looked over in his cool California attitude and was like, "Man, your family is beautiful.  Look at all your beautiful kids and your pregnant wife.  I love that.  We've got a big family at home and I think it's just a beautiful thing, dude."  And I remember really appreciating for the first time, "Yes.  This is my awesome big family.  We are officially big family people!"

I always wanted a big family when I grew up.  Growing up with just my Mom and my brother always felt lonely.  My brother was 5 years older than me, we had nothing in common and truly I spent most of my childhood feeling like an only child.  I knew when I grew up I wanted as many babies as I could.  Life happened, unexpected babies happened, first marriages, 2nd babies, divorces, re-marriages, bonus kids and now new kids happened and BOOM, I am living the dream.  Somewhere between 2 different schools and daycare, printing homework for 3 grade levels, parent teacher conferences for 3 kids, volleyball games and gymnastics practices, I realized that I am here.  In my family of 6 I am living the chaos I dreamed of.  And it's so sweet.  A brilliant and stressful show every day.  A life that takes a lot of planning, a life that sometimes skips showers, goes days without groceries because there is no time for the store, a life that has 4 little people laying around in their chonies watching cartoons before 7:30am.  I'm so blessed and I can see before my eyes how rich this experience is for our kids and it fills me to my fingertips with sparkly joy.  I watch my children and see them practice life.  They learn to share, to fight, to defend, to plot, to work together, to sacrafice, to love unconditionally and how to say sorry.  They learn responsibility and what it means to take accountability for your actions.  They learn that life isn't fair and your older sister gets to stay up later and your little brother gets to read with parents at night.  I love it, even at it's highest peak of crazy, it's enriching to the very depth of my soul.  I have never been more busy or more stressed, but I go to sleep and wake up happy.  Every single day.

So in my moment of appreciation, I wanted to take a minute to share the little moments that make our big family. 

 

Sisters taking care of brothers.

 

 

Naps caught whenever we can snag them.

 

 

Introverted boys.  Extroverted girls.

 

 

Music.

 

 

Everyone going different directions.

 

 

Big brothers being curious about little brothers.

 

 

Homemade cakes and family birthday parties.  Summer swimming every night because it's free fun!

 

 

Early morning cranky.

 

 

Photo-bombing.

 

 

Walks to school every day.

 

 

Trying unsuccessfully to catch everyone in a picture.

 

 

Early morning movies before school in our jammies.

 

 

Stealing kisses from my husband at soccer practices.

 

 

Finding time to play with my husband (here is Cam playing dress up in my Fergie Ferg shirt)

 

 

The kids looking totally joyful while we are simply at a gas station pumping gas.

 

 

Fancy birthday dinners!

 

 

Going eye class shopping with my best friend.

 

And my favorite...

 

When everyone is in the living room, it feels like the whole world has stopped and everything we need is right there.  It feels like a big deep breath after a long day. 

 

I am so lucky.